This is a sweet little cartoon. And kind of offensive. And a kid is given a peace pipe.
This is blowing my mind.
Congo.
How fucking ridiculous is the plot of Congo? There is a gorilla trained to say words and somehow it gets mixed up in an international scheme, led by Tim Curry, to extract diamonds from the grasps of “ugly gorillas” in the heart of the Congo.
Jesus Christ.
The shit I loved as a kid.
Gets better when you’re not such a dipshit.
The Greatest Accessory of All*
I’ve been walking around Williamsburg recently, digging all the hairbands that keep humidity hair fashionable, loving the long necklaces. I watch all my fellow BillyBurg residents, scanning for the newest and cutting edge of fashion. And, I am proud to say i found it. The greatest accessory of all: the human baby. While some may still think that the tiny dog in purse is in (sorry Paris Hilton) or that the cat on a leash (although risky and rarely attempted), the human baby is the ultimate step in fashion right now. What makes the baby unique to Williamsburg is the style with which they are displayed. Mothers of course hold it down with carrying wraps that make me even want a little one to show off. And nobody can tell me that the action dad I saw cradling his newborn on his forearm wasn’t killing it. *reprinted after not getting successfully posted on a Williamsburg fashion blog I was hired for
Honestly, I’m glad Kevin grew up to be like this. He’s basically telling Buzz to Kiss his butt.
(Source: babywitches, via indygochild)
Movie Review: New York movies!
So, as a semi-unemployed cinefile sitting around my apartment with high-speed internet, I have been working through the Netflix catalog with all movies that have “New York” in it.
As my avid readers know, I basically tore New York I Love You! a new one. In retrospect I totally get why it didn’t and I can’t remember if I explained, BUT if you want to talk more get at me, or tweet my ass.
Gangs of New York
- This is a great movie. For a while I couldn’t find it, because up here it’s just called Gangs. Daniel Day Lewis really works Leo over, and as we all know, Leo is such a heart-throb. I can only watch it in 10 minute installments though, but it’s great.
Escape From New York
- A classic. It’s great to see this place in turmoil but with John Waters at the helm. A good time and you can’t really beat the late-80s-post-apocalyptic aesthetic channelled here.
More films to check out (this is a note to self):
- Manhattan Murder Mystery
- Manhattan
- New York, New York
Movie Review: New York, I Love You.
This movie sucked. I mean I have more patience than most people, and maybe I was a little higher on than most people, but you can’t recreate success without realizing the absolute most important thing to understand is the SPIRIT.
NYILY was just a collage of semi-famous faces and hip cuts and a really, really wack filmmaker-chick character.
P.S. watching Gangs of New York gives me a special chill now I’m a resident New Yorker.
John Cardiel on Epicly Later’d: Beyond the Board
As a kid I was a huge fan of John Cardiel. I remember seeing Sight Unseen and him ripping it. Getting big air, hitting huge rails. Just absolutely gnarly.
Epicly Later’d did an 88min. episode on Cardiel. It encapsulates the spirit of a skater, the idea that vibing on the moment is of the utmost importance, whether its skating or craps or a board game.
Cardiel is from the sticks and a Californian, and his crew rolls just as hard. There is footage of shooting off guns, jumping down insane gaps or into insane downhills.
The footage shreds and the interviews with Cardiel are so funny because of how obviously Cali he is (cough cough stoner).
Then in 2003 he was hit by a car on a trip to Austrailia. Diagnosed never to walk again.
Devastating.
The end of the documentary show Cardiel dropping into a bowl and ripping as well as one can with a tiny range of motion in his body.
Peep it. You’ll laugh, you might cry, but you’ll certainly see a gnarly guy whose spirit is unbound.
*Epicly Later’d is a VBS TV production. Can be found on Netflix. A great series to check up on skating how it was in the 90’s, like E! Another series to check out is Skate Europe, which profiles European countries in each episode and the scene that thrived there in the 90’s.
Why NBC’s The Office Sucks In a Post-Pam-and-Jim-are-Married World
Let’s not lie to ourselves, NBC’s The Office is a dope show. The first three seasons, although I was a die-hard Gervais fan and had my serious doubts about the American series’ longevity, are some of the best moments in the history of NBC if not all comedy television. Even the wedding episode in Niagra was a lot of fun for this guy.
Here’s what ruined that show: SENTIMENTALITY.
As soon as the heartfelt moments outweigh the peevish tricks of petty rivalries, the accidental racism and the intentional innuendos, then you have your failure in comedy.
Yeah, sure. I want to have fun and laugh. That’s comedy. I must laugh. But as soon as the cute couple having a fucking baby and finding a fucking daycare on their lunch break, pull the plug.
Comedy (devoid of sentimentality) > anything sentimental = ME LIKEY!
Now, some people may be like, “But John, you are just confusing the baby and we all know how you don’t really plan on kids.” And while this is partially true, the thing is that Cici (or however you spell it; first off, that would be fucking American if the baby was in fact named after the shitty pizza buffet) is just a microcosm for the main pull of the series is devoid and resulted in a baby, an out-of-wedlock baby.
Make us laugh but don’t be thoroughly nice. Don’t have scenes end on touching moments. I don’t want to see Jim and Dwight getting along, Kevin being well-liked, Andy realizing he’s racist. Give us hell!
Ask the Marx Brothers.
